This is for you, Danielle!

Since I'm fairly certain that Danielle is the only one still reading... and she's previously asked for the "Carson Birth Story" I'll try to recall the details and anyone who stumbles upon this might be somewhat enthused. ... Birth Story... where do I even start?

Friday, September 17, 2010 was my last day of work before Maternity Leave. I was due September the 21 and was planning on being overdue (I really hate disappointment, so I figured I'd go with worst case scenario in this instance). I thought I'd have a chance to relax a little bit, bum around on the couch, maybe put some finishing touches on Carson's room, etc. That night as my last "hoorah" we went to Matt's parents for Mama's Pizza and a movie... although now I can't remember what movie it was. Oh yeah, Date Night! Anyway, this was also not an uncommon thing, we usually went to Matt's parents on Friday nights.

We came home pretty late... and got to bed pretty late as well (poor planning on my part). At about 3:00 am, my water broke. Turns out this only happens for like 15% of women. At first I wasn't sure that that was it. I wasn't having contractions, and I wasn't quite ready to be excited (again, the whole disappointment thing). Matt was pretty confident that it was my water (I mean, what else could it have been? It didn't smell like I had "wet" the bed). After I was convinced this was the case, I called my mom. My dad actually answered and asked for us to call as we got closer to Harris SW. I then called Matt's Mom. This was what I call Grandma Epic Fail. She didn't answer! The entire 2 weeks before that she would answer the phone "Is it baby time?" and THE one time she should've answered, she didn't. Turns out, her phone was still on silent from the movie. So, I then call Mary. Sidenote- Mary is the best way for us to communicate with Matt's family. She answered in a very groggy voice (after all, it was 3 am) and I said, "Mary, your mom needs to answer her phone!" and she responded "**Gasp** Are you serious? Okay, bye."

So after that I took my time a little bit, took a shower, got some stuff together (still no contractions). Even Matt took a shower. Matt made me take one last pic (I thought about posting it, although it's by far THE worst pic of me EVER). I look like a beached whale. Since I was starting to feel some pain, I decided we should head up to the hospital. It was probably about 4 am at this point.

One of our good friends (and awesome Visiting Teacher) is an ER nurse at Harris SW (Barb used-to-be-Meyers Gilchrist). She had informed me 2 days before that she would be working that weekend and hoped to see me. Thanks for the good luck, Barb! So I called up there to tell her we were headed that way and she said she'd meet me out front with a wheel chair.

She did. And I'll never forget when I got up to Labor and Delivery. Barb wheeled me into the room that they had gotten ready and the nurse asked "what is your complaint?"

I'm surprised my pregnant self did not unleash on this poor ignorant woman! I mean, really! I'm as large as a cow, in a wheel chair, wincing every few minutes in pain IN labor and delivery, what do you think my complaint is? That I stubbed my toe? Hello, I am having a baby!

What Barb later communicated to me was that since I told her that my water had broken, she took that to mean that I had wet myself. I had to explain to her that my water broke at home and that I didn't ride to the hospital on a towel because I had already handled my situation! Turns out I was like the 5th person to have their water break in the ER that night and having your water break is somewhat uncommon.

Once I was in my gown and all, my next question was "when can I get my epidural?" Which was a whole new "adventure".

Once the anesthesiologist came in I was relieved. I knew that everyone said that it can be really uncomfortable for the initial needle to go in, but totally worth it. I was okay with that. In fact, I don't remember contracting any of the four times it took him to get it in my back. That's right, FOUR times! After the anesth. came in he tells me that this can cause paralysis and yada yada. Of course I say "I know, I know, just give it to me!" At this point in my pregnancy, I was SO swollen that besides my toes being actual sausage links, my back was (according to the Anesth.) "all wrong for this." The first time he tried I was screaming (because it hurt) but that didn't mean I didn't want it. I just have a really low pain tolerance- hence the want for the epidural, right? He yanked the needle right out and said, "I can't do this, I'm hurting you too bad." I was afraid he was right, but he gave it one more try. All I remember from that was praying SO hard that it would work. And it did!

This was the best part of labor! I slept. A lot! The nurses were in and out monitoring my levels and such, and I did have to be put on some oxygen because the baby's heart beat was reflecting some stress, but that seemed to be about it.

After a few hours one of the nurses came in to tell me that Carson's head was at a really weird angle. At this point I fear that after all of what I have gone through was a waste because they would c-section anyway. But what the nurse went on to say was that she wanted me to lay on my side to see if I could get him to shift because his head was smushed up against my pelvic bone or something. Long story, short, it worked.

You know, your entire pregnancy people tell you "horror" stories about things to make sure you do or don't do. The one I remember the most was "if you feel pain, ask for more drugs"

It was about 2 o'clock in the afternoon at this point and I was feeling pain besides pressure. I wanted to tell them now before it was too late. My doctor had mentioned that with your first it was common to have 15-18 hour labor. I figured I had a few more hours but that I didn't want to wait until it was past the time of getting any more drugs and having to suffer through it "alone".

So the Anesth. returned to give me another dose of this stuff. Just after that, the nurse checked me and said "Oh, it's time to push!"

This put me into a panic! I wasn't ready for this. I didn't want to push but also, I didn't want the baby to fall out of me because my doctor wasn't in the room.

At this point I had a really good nurse who can see by the look on my face that I had no idea how this baby was really going to come out of me! She then asked "did you take any birthing classes?" to which I answered, "no." Her face told me "out of all of the women I've ever helped in delivery YOU should have been the one to take them" but her mouth politely said "it's okay, women do this EVERY day, you can do this!"Matt leaned over and said "Hon, there's another girl down the hall who is using the same doctor, I think we can beat her!"

So the nurses got out these stirrup thingies for my legs so I had pressure to against. However, I was too short to really use them. So at every contraction my mom and Matt would push against my feet. After about an hour of pushing, Carson Andrew was born at 3:04pm on September 18, 2010. 7 lbs, 13 oz and 20 inches long.

That's the condensed version, if you can believe that. But when the doctor took him out, and rested him on my stomach, all I could think was "someone fix his head, someone fix his head, someone fix his head." Needless to say, he has a really nicely shaped head now.

So there you go, Danielle, hope you enjoyed!

What?? We have a blog?

Good Morning folks (for those of you who still have us on your feed). I happened to stumble across our blog (which I forgot the web address to). SO much has changed.

For starters, ummm, we have a baby. His name is Carson and he is THE cutest thing EVER!!! Also, Matt pretty much quit Tipping the Scale. And... so did I. I miss it a whole lot and would like to get back with it, we shall see.

Matt started his own business and has been doing REALLY well with it! He does Multimedia stuff, corporate branding, videography, editing, etc. and has been working with his sister, Mary (who is getting married in March) in helping her get her photography business going.

I FINALLY got the promotion I've been desiring for a while to the Assistant Branch Manager at one of the locations for the Bank I work for. I'm SO fortunate to have a great boss who, for starters, hired me 7 months pregnant with the hopes that I would return. I did return, but it hasn't been easy. I'll be straight up honest: I couldn't do it without Matt. I've been super fortunate having Matt in my life to get up with Carson each time he cries when I have to get up for work in the morning. Ladies- you can be jealous!

Well that pretty much sums up my life for the past year, that was not nearly as long as I thought it would take. Perhaps I'll get back into this thing... I guess it depends on if anyone else is still reading.

Job Search

Hey everyone. With "Tipping the Scale" on hiatus, and an unexpected wave of free time, I find myself able to update The Cobb Spot. As some of you may know, the company I worked for was recently seized by a credit union and I was let go in the transition. I am in the process of job hunting and so I thought I would use our blog network as yet another tool. My skillset includes the following, and although I'm looking for a full time position, all of these services are available for hire on a per-job basis.

Photo Editing/Manipulation
Corporate Identity Design
Videography
Editing
Lighting
Directing
Producing
Writing/Scripting
Live broadcast
(some)Web design
Motion Graphics
and Consultation in any of these areas

Here is some of my work:










I'd really like to stay in the television or film industry, but I'm also not opposed to doing manual labor. I won't let my pride keep me from paying the bills if you know what I'm saying.

Please keep me in mind should you happen to catch wind of any work that might fit my talents.

Thanks everyone!

Hey everyone! I know it's been a long time since we've updated, but that's because we've been working on a special project as of late. We've created a new blog that deals exclusively with Matt and I, and the struggles we have with our health and fitness. (Or more accurately... our complete lack thereof) It's going to be done with video episodes, and we're hoping to do one every week. We've successfully uploaded Episode 1 - part 1 of 3 and the others should be up before tomorrow.

Everybody go check it out and let us know what you think! I'll be the first to tell you that this week's episode is a little dry, but in the coming weeks we have some fun stuff planned. So be sure to stay tuned!!!

Tipping the Scale

The link was incorrect before, but it should be working now... sorry for the mix-up.

From Father to Son

I was asked to speak in church today and the subject was .... SURPRISE... the influence of fathers. I'm not going to post the talk, but while writing the talk I was struck with a creative bug and wound up writing a poem that I'd like to share. Hope you like it.

From Father to Son…

 

You taught me how to tie my shoes and say my ABCs

You picked me up when I fell down and tended to scraped knees

You showed me how to treat my mom with love and with respect

My manners and my character never to neglect

 

You taught me when to hold back tears and put on a strong face

You taught me the important things, never to disgrace

Like family- and baseball- my values- and my God

What big tracks I must follow in, if with you I’m to trod

 

You showed me there were times when we must look out for the weak

That truly we are slighter than the humble and the meek

You taught me being biggest doesn’t always win the round

That rather it’s the smartest man who goes home with the crown

 

Clean me up and tuck me in, watch over me at night

Teach me when to stand my ground and ready me to fight

For good- and right- and decent things- that need someone to say

I’ll not back down I’ll not turn back, my dad raised me this way

 

And now I stand impatiently, in this sterile place

and wait to hold my little one and look upon his face

And tell him of the fun adventures we are sure to have

With him and me and Grandpa, as I learn to be a dad

 

To teach him how to tie his shoes and say his ABCs

And pick him up when he falls down and tend to his scraped knees

As I try my best to teach him how he ought to be

I’ll think back upon you dad, and the way that you raised me 

We're not dead

Okay... I want to first and foremost apologize to any blogfollowers that we do have. We have fallen off the face of the earth but we are BACK!! Let me try my hardest to do a quick update over the past couple of months.

I finally got my new(er) car. My old car was dear to me, but it was also the one Matt used to go to school for three years... it was about 15 years old, had not a/c and no radio. As you can imagine, this made my 40 minute commute very pleasant. In all actuality, I am grateful for it (not that I don't adore my new car). It made me really appreciate things like overpasses. When traffic was really bad and the sun was really shiny, I appreciated the brief time I was stuck under the overpass. Also, it was quiet. It was a good time for me to reflect on things. Or I could sing as loud as and however I wanted to and didn't have to hear someone say "you know, those aren't even notes".

Last month I got a 2007 White Honda Accord Sedan. I know, I'm ballin'! We're fans of Hondas, they've always done right by us so we're loyal. It's nothing special, except that it does in fact have air conditioning AND a radio. It also has a 6 cd changer. Perhaps I'll post some pictures some time. The drawback to my new ride is that my baby girl is (for now) not allowed to go with me. Millie Bear HATES this. She loves car rides and quite frankly, doesn't understand why Daddy won't let her go places with Mommy anymore... Since I'm trying to be a better wife, I respect my husband's wishes and I understand the reasoning behind it, but it's my car and my puppy dog, right?

-----sidenote---- We sold my old car to Matt's cousin Chris. Chris lives in Nebraska. Matt was up that way for business a few weeks ago and brought Chris and his girlfriend back down here so that they could drive the car up there. Umm... Disaster. Matt called his aunt after not hearing from her after that weekend and she proceeded to tell him that somewhere in Oklahoma (i think?) the car broke down. Let's just say it was an adventure.... I still feel really bad about the whole thing. I was pretty sure that car was gonna last forever. Instead, just 250,000 miles. What a disappointment!

Anyway, as I mentioned, Matt was out of town for business for about a week, but luckily was not far from extended family. So it worked out well. He was able to go to church with his Aunt Kelly & Fam and eat dinner there so that he didn't have to break the sabbath while out on business.

Let's see... I've been busy as ever at work. The manager that I assist is still on maternity leave and we're short handed at work so I've been running around like crazy. I feel like there just isn't enough time in the day. The real frustration with all of that is that I'm not allowed to get overtime, but I'm supposed to find time to do 3 people's jobs? Ah well. 

Most recently Matt and I have started a new challenge. A summer 90 day challenge. My end result goal is to be more fit. More spiritually and physically and relationshiply (<--don't think that's a word) fit. We started off with a two day fast which apparently caused a lot of controversy for my facebook friends. We did drink water. I know it sounds like a lot. Our bodies were able to do it. I know that we'll be blessed for it as well. I know that we would be blessed for doing a one day fast, but why not ask Heavenly Father for more blessings? He's waiting to pour them out! I really just needed all of the help I could get, our challenge is a bit, well, challenging. It's different. One of the things that we're no longer doing is watching television during the week. I am SO productive! Who'da thunk? I have time to work out, and work on the house, and get things accomplished that we've been putting off, it's great! I recommend that you all should try it for at least one week. Turns out, I don't even really care for tv. I've also (so far) really enjoyed spending more quality time with Matt. My calling at church can keep me pretty busy, and when I'm not so busy, it's nice to spend real time with my hubby. I've also been finding myself more entertained by Millie (i.e. right now she's sleeping and dreaming. She's doing these little half barks and I'm trying not to laugh too loudly so that I don't wake her up). Maybe someday soon I'll post some videos of her.  (I find that posting pics and videos can be a bit time consuming for someone like myself that doesn't know how to do it or wants to really take the time to, sorry.)

That seems like just about it for now. Matt and I are just stayin' busy. The week after next I'll be going to GIRLS CAMP! WOOT WOOT! I'm TOTALLY stoked. We have such great girls in our stake! It's really a privilege to go to camp with them. 

Also, our anniversary happens during Girls Camp, so the following weekend I'm flying to Utah. Matt has another auction in Park City. He flies out Thursday morning. I really wanted to go with him but I'm taking the previous week off for Girls Camp so I'm flying out Friday afternoon after work and then I'll return Sunday evening. I'm a little bit nervous -besides the fact that flying can be excruciatingly painful on my ears- I've never flown alone. Am I a big enough girl to handle that? Hope so, since the ticket isn't refundable. It'll be our 4th anniversary. Can you even believe it? 

So things are really eventful, but good. 

I'm sorry I've (we've) neglected our blog. Maybe when Matt's out of town I'll have time to figure out how to post pics and videos. I don't know, we'll see. Well, thanks for your patience, I miss you guys!! 

Linds 

Well as Lindsey mentioned in her last post, I have been working very hard lately on something that (for the moment) I am quite proud of.

The company I work for has a strategic partnership with Pfizer, the pharmaceutical company. Along with prescription medication for people, they make a variety of medications/vaccines and other health products for livestock, and we help them promote those products. Along with producing and broadcasting cattle auctions, Superior Livestock has a full service production department which houses a very talented team of video professionals. Because of our relationship with Pfizer, they have agreed to sit down and discuss the possibility of letting Superior be a main source of Marketing for their company. However, we need to do a LOT of convincing before that is even on the table.

So about 2 months ago I was invited to a meeting to discuss what we could do to impress our prospective clients. It was decided that we would create a commercial, and to make a VERY long story short, I took the lead in the pre-production and between me and my co-worker Adam, concepted the entire thing. Then I was asked to direct the commercial and was in effect given the nod to take point on the entire project.

Unfortunately in the last 2 days of the project the entire plan was scrapped in favor of a new direction. So the bad news is that you will not be seeing this version of my directorial debut on a television screen near you, but it's without a doubt my most impressive work to date, so I finished it up on my own time and posted it here so that my friends and family can enjoy it. So without further ado...

Matt "Spielberg"

I just wanted to take a few minutes and just brag on how great my husband is. I know everyone thinks that their husband is the best, but I know mine is. I'm really grateful for such a wonderful guy who has dreams and aspirations and doesn't let anything get in his way. I know he's been busy, but I know he loves me and that he really is trying to do what's best for our family. I really appreciate all of his hard work (even though I may give him a hard time about it occasionally) and I'm so freakin' proud of him. I'll let him expound on this, 'cause it's always better comin' from him. :)

I love you, Matt!

Conference Confidence

Hello all! Well after this weekend's conference talks I've had a boost of confidence in my Heavenly Father. Not that I ever lacked faith, but I was just totally reaffirmed. I know that my Heavenly Father really does know what's best for me. I can try all I want to figure out my life and when I'd like major events to happen in my life, but ultimately, it's not up to me. It's up to my Heavenly Father and I trust him. He knows when I can and cannot handle curveballs thrown my way and I've put all my faith in him. He's amazing. I just wanted to share that with you guys. Thanks for reading!!

Re-Finding, and Refining

(To clarify, this is Matt's post. He was apparently logged in as me when it was written)

In today's atmosphere of constant connection and online social networking, I find myself talking to people that I haven't seen (or even thought about) in years. I have two seemingly conflicting ideas on that subject. On the one hand; it is so interesting to see the paths that people choose, and to then get to see the destinations they've reached because of those paths. It's fun to reminisce on old times, and recall all the reasons that you were friends to begin with.

On the other hand, at some point you very well might come to realize that there was a reason you grew apart. As we learn and grow throughout our lives, we become different people. Ideally... better people. So when confronted with the past, do we readily see that the person we are today will only become bogged down by the relationships of yesterday, or do we allow ourselves latitude to explore what could become a friendship reborn?

Unfortunately I often find that time spent with old friends brings back an older version of my current self. At the time I'm sure I found my thoughts and actions (and maybe even my fashion choices) more than suitable. However, as the man I am today, I look back with a certain amount of confusion. How did I ever think THAT girl was pretty? Why did I always try to act so tough around THAT guy? Why did I make so many bad decisions around THIS group? Did anyone REALLY think psychedelic patterned neon shorts looked good?

So as strange as it might seem... I have been doing some mental/emotional house cleaning with regards to my social life. Interestingly enough, as I do so I am learning that every relationship I have ever had, that is worth maintaining, I have maintained. To one degree or another, I am still close to everyone in my life that matters to me. I might not be able to spend a lot of time with them, or talk to them as much as I'd like, but that emotional bond, that love, and that connection will always be there. Ready to pick back up right where it left off. And most of those friendships that have faded away, or dwindled over time, have done so only because they were weak, petty, superficial, or possibly just unnecessary all along.





On a more playful note, I have made one of the coolest discoveries EVER, and it's right in my own back yard. As soon as I have a chance (hopefully this week) I will take some pictures and post them for everyone to see. So come back soon and check it out. It's worth a teaser. Trust me.

Happy Month Later

Hey guys!! I know, I know... it's been a month almost and nothin'. lol. Matt and I have been staying pretty busy. He's doing a lot of stuff at work, but most of it he's really enjoying, so that's good. Things are starting to get a little crazy for me. I love my calling, but Girls Camp is quickly approaching, which means more on the brain, but i LOVE it!! I'm also getting busier at work, not to mention, i'm throwing my manager a baby shower on the same day that I have a YW event, but she'll be gone soon and I'm the one to fill in for her while she's out.

The house is good. As you may or may not have seen from my pics (Mandy, I'll try to ... oh, i can email them all to you if you'd like... they're on my phone so it will be several emails, let me know if you're okay with that). We're really enjoying it. Matt's got the garage set up for me to do my work out videos in it, which is nice. Not that i've done it very much, but Mary and I have had a blast... I find it's really awkward when the garage door is open! haha!

Umm... other than that, it's all pretty much the same. Millie's good. :) She loves her big back yard. I'm really enjoying this weather, it's been nice and I don't have to water my plants as often, so that's good.

I really wish Matt would get on here and post something fun and quirky... I miss his writing too! Maybe if you all post that you'd like to hear from him, he'll break down and post! :)

Well that's us for now!! Thanks for reading!

Linds

Domestication!

Hey guys! this blog is gonna be really short. Basically, I haven't quite mastered the patience it takes me to upload pics onto here. But i took lots of pics on my iPhone and uploaded them to my facebook. My facebook isn't locked 

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=507418056&ref=profile

i hope that link works :-/

anyway its lots of pics of my house! i don't think many of you have seen it so there ya go. if it doesn't let you in, create a facebook and look for me. lol. if you don't want to keep it afterwards, then don't... 

sorry i guess i'm not really that domesticated if i can't upload lots of pics on here.... 

happy viewing! 

-Linds

my place in this world

hrm. Bonnie posted a blog a few weeks ago about her feelings and about what a blog really is, and it kinda inspired me (i heart you, Bonnie Jean). 

So if you don't want to continue reading, it's cool. :)

I love my calling. I love to serve these Young Women and to see the light they shine. I love it, I love it, I love it. But I suppose I'm in somewhat of a predicament. You know that awkward stage where you're a teenager and you want so badly to be young and hip, but you want so badly to be an adult? I'm still there. 

I guess I've always kinda had a problem with fitting in. I would probably consider myself a friendly person, but I'm shy. Heh, can you believe that? It's weird, though. I'm shy around people that I know. It's like I don't know how they take me. Do they remember me? Do they want to talk to me? Do they think I'm stuck up because I'm not approaching them? And by this time too much time has elapsed and it's awkward. I'm no good at awkward which is probably why I don't really have well.... I don't have many friends, or ones that live here and are available to hang with. Sure, there are people that I admire and look up to, but sometimes I wonder if they feel the same about me or if I'm still that annoying little teenager that they hope will one day leave them alone. If that's not the case, then it's these young women where I feel the most comfortable as far as belonging. But then I wonder if they are thinking similar things (except for the teenager and growing up part). I'm in this boat. Either everyone I know knew me as much younger, or I know them now and they have kids. We're like at different places in life. I want badly to have a lot of good friends, but I guess as I grew older I kinda forgot how to become friends. 

After a lot of mixed emotions, I realized what was underlying. I have a best friend. A friend that will be there for me no matter what! Who doesn't think I'm annoying or childish (and if I am, he doesn't say so). A friend who cares for me as much as I do him. Does he feel these similar feelings from me? I admire him so much, and he loves that about me. Although this sounds much like my dear husband, it's not. It's my Savior. 

Once again, a lot of emotions-- Have I abandoned Him? the weird thing is that Matt and I are on this 40 day challenge. We've been doing well for the past 10 days, and part of this challenge is reading scriptures together and praying together. You would think that these actions would draw me nearer to my Savior. Perhaps most of this is Satan taking my insecurities and trying to make me feel like nobody wants to be my friend. I know that's not true. So I won't let him. It's like I'm trying so hard to fit in, when I was born to stand out. (I'm thinking that's a quote from something but I can't remember what) I know I can overcome this with the help of my Savior. Like I said, he's always there for me. 

Don't feel obligated to comment. I'm good. I guess I figure things out better if I can get them out of my head.

ps- I want to be your friend!

7 Things (but not really)

I won't drag everyone through reading the exact same blog twice so I'll just touch on what went through my head whilst reading my lovely wife's responses.

- We have been in our house for less than 2 months. I have taken out my toolbox at least once a day since we moved in. Tightening this, hanging that, leveling this, shoring up that, installing this, building that. I've drilled, I've painted, I've smoothed, I've buffed, I've mounted, and I've shimmed just about everything inside our property line. And yet my wife still feels the need to say "finally" in reference to me hanging her shelves. Sheesh. I guess she doesn't realize that millions of people live in a house with unfinished (or unstarted) projects all the time, and take no issue with it. LOL

- I need to clarify Lindsey's "organizing"... I believe the word she is looking for is "compacting". Which I consider an entirely different talent. While the ability to fit a large amount of things into a small space comes in handy while packing for a trip... it has the opposite effect when cleaning. I cannot tell you how many times I've opened a drawer and found so many things "compacted" (crammed) into it, that it A: makes getting what I need almost impossible, and B: makes it unlikely that I can ever get that drawer closed again.

- One of the reasons "Don't forget" comes out of Lindsey's mouth so often, is that my #1 thing that I say all the time is "Hey hun, don't let me forget..."

- As for things I love about Lindsey, I love that she had trouble coming up with things to fill all her lists of 7, except the one of things she loved about me. She didn't even hesitate while typing it.

- Finally, I don't want to leave Lindsey's account of my technical endevors unexplained, lest I seem lame and technically ignorant. The problem we had was that our house was not built with a phone jack in the room we use for our office. Since our Mac was built before wireless network cards were standard protocal, it would need a "mac technician" to upgrade some of the hardware and manually change something in the operating system if we wanted to access our home network wirelessly. Instead, I decided to hardwire an ethernet cable through a common wall, into the office. So I bought a terminal for each side of the wall , and hard wired them together, then mounted one on each side of the wall. So instead of having something like this:

We have something nice and clean like this...

However, the in between stages, looked like this...

Don't ask me how.

Week in review + 7 things tagged by Mandy

Let's see here... this week has been... okay I suppose. We had a party for our Sunday School class which brought way too much junk food in the house for our diets. (yeah, we're back on that) It worked out okay though because Matt's mom took most of it after my threat to trash it all. In my opinion, it's not a waste, I would pay that much to be skinny and we got our use out of it. 

Anyway... I also won tickets to the Dallas Stars hockey game this weekend. It was a district wide contest at work and I won. I was a little unsure about going seeing as how Matt's allergies were flaring up again and I had to work that morning, but I thought it would be a cheap cool thing to do, since the tickets were free and came with a parking pass. Boy am I glad we went. The seats were called Platinum or something and basically was like one step down from being in the box. We had a private escalator and our own server. It was cool, so at this point (even after pigging out Friday night at our party) we had to order cheeseburgers. We're both way glad we went. It was neat, even though they lost. 

Also, can I just say that my husband is SO handy? I'm so grateful for this! Besides the fact that he's (finally) putting up the floating wall shelves in our bedroom as I type, this weekend he learned by himself how to set up our internet. Okay, I know for most of you that seems like an easy task, but we wanted something a little more complex. We have iPhones, so we naturally wanted WiFi. But, because we have a mac that was made before a certain time we'd have to take our machine to the apple store to get something set up for it. (okay... i'll be honest, i'm not quite sure exactly what it is we needed, I don't get into all the technical stuff, I have him for that, so if you're technologically minded and this doesn't make sense, sorry). So he hard wired the internet to the computer in the office and set up a jack through the wall to the living room for wifi thing (i think...)Well basically, he taught himself how to put this thing through the wall and set it up and works. That's a simpler way of putting it. I'm sure he'll get on here and post how it really is. 

So... I can post from my own computer, which I've missed dearly. I've either been posting from work when it's slow or from my iPhone. I love my phone... but posting a whole blog is a little challenging... well, time consuming. 

I also wrote a letter to Sean. I put it out in the mailbox a little bit ago so that I wouldn't forget to mail it. (i do that ... a lot it seems. i'll write a letter and never mail it). He's on a mission right now. It was a challenge. I didn't really know what to say. I just remember something that happened to Matt once. Matt wrote an email to a missionary once telling him about things going on and certain events that had been done with him in the past, but basically saying that Matt was filling his shoes in his honor. He found out later that it made him miss home a lot. I'm sure serving a mission isn't easy, and I didn't want Sean to miss home more than he already did. I kinda did a brief run through of how things were going w/ Matt and Me and Millie and that I wasn't pregnant (since he asked in like his first letter home) and told him we were proud of him for serving. So... if y'all have any other ideas of how I could change up my weekly letter to him, lemme know... I don't want it to be a dread that he gets a letter from me. 

okay... now for this post. I think Mandy tagged me... there were like for 4 Lindseys on there... so... if I'm not one, I'll feel pretty stupid...  so here goes.  Oh yeah, Mandy, we're a lot alike in some ways... I think that's cool, 'cause I admire you.

7 things

7 things I can do:

1. Drive a stick shift. Matt taught me in one day. My stomach was a little (a lot) unsettled for a couple hours, but I'm glad I learned, even though I was really emotional about it.

2. Decorate. If given the things I want (heh) I can usually display them in an eye pleasing way. I think this comes from Matt as well. Going to an art school, he's very visual. 

3. Give my dog a bath. This may not seem challenging to most of you. Millie is... between 45-50 lbs. She doesn't like to get in the tub. Matt doesn't usually help me with this... hrm.. never helps me with this. I have to trick her. I feel a little guilty at first, but after she's all clean, I don't worry. I have to get the bathroom set up with all of the things I need in advance. Then coerce her as close to the bathroom as possible and then grab her, pick her up, and set her in the tub. She hates it. Preparation for motherhood, I suppose.

4. I don't know that I'd say organize (like Mandy) but I have this weird knack for compacting things. Sometimes it takes about two tries, but I can fit a lotta stuff in an itty bitty space. Not sure if it's the years of camp/efy, family road trips or what. It works out well though when Matt has to leave on business and has no clue how to cram all of his things in a small bag. I guess it's a talent. 

5. I, too can remember just about anything. I will say that journaling has helped. It usually had to do with what I was wearing when it happened. However, it most often was recalled at what time in my life it occurred based on the way my bedroom was arranged. It's weird, I know. 

6. Know what Millie is trying to say and then verbalizing it for her. Yeah, for real. 

7. Love my husband unconditionally. He's a really great guy.... but he is a guy. 

7 things I cannot do

1. Sing. or have any musical talent at all. I love to sing, especially hymns or primary songs... but I'm tone deaf (and a word forgetter...) 

 If I have accompaniment then I can usually carry the tune, but I can't really sing. Thanks, sweetie for putting up with me at church!

2. Deck out my page. I'm pretty sure Matt wants it to be the same just like it is forever and for always, but I'd like to spruce it up all cutesie every now and then... I just don't know how to do it... or really have the patience to teach myself. This layout will suffice.

3. Dance like Carlton on Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. Mandy, I'm mostly jealous of Ali and Kristyn because I'd LOVE to see this!

4. Anything Matt's really good at. i.e. Photoshop... handy man stuff... He's offered to teach me when I'd like to do something, but it usually ends up that we're either in a time crunch or he can do it much better so I leave it to him. 

5. Go a year without getting my car damaged in some way. This is not always my fault! 

6. Try new foods. Every time we go out to a restaurant (for example) I get the same thing. It's usually because when I think of where we're going, I already crave it. I also don't want to order something and not like it as much as I liked my signature item, so I stick with that. 

7. Reach any of the top shelves. I have a stool now. And sometimes, if I wear heels while on the stool I don't have to crawl up on something else. ... sometimes. 

7 things I say often:

1. You don't even know (this came from Mary)

2. What? :) (when I know I'm guilty of something)

3. No ma'am. Usually when Millie is in trouble, but I have been known to say it to others, like Cheryl, for instance.

4. Buttmunch. No one likes a Butt Munch. (this came from an episode of friends, but a lot of the time accurately portrays how Matt is acting).

5. Don't forget. Sometimes this is in vain. Matt usually forgets anyway.

6. Doesn't tickle. I use this line when I'm tickling Matt and he's not laughing. I figure if he's not laughing, then it doesn't tickle, and I can do it as much as I like. When he does it to me, I always freak out and reply with "DOES TICKLE!"

7. Helicopter butt. hahah... okay... Millie has a really strong and violent tail. She usually ends up wagging her butt instead of her tail, but when she does wag her tail, it's not back and forth. She wags it in a rotating circle like a helicopter. I'd like to see it pick her up and fly her around like on the cartoons. 

7 things I love about Matt:

1. See list labeled "things I cannot do"

2. He puts up with me and my whining. a lot. 

3. He takes me shopping and can empathize when I want a new pair of shoes. As long as it's not new flats, he's usually in. 

4. He makes me a better person. 

5. He's so freakin funny. Pretty much why I married him. My patriarchal blessing mentions someone who will bring me much joy and laughter. You can't argue that that isn't Matt!

6. He bought me a house... which i LOVE!

7. He's a worth priesthood holder. This is such a blessing in my life, and I'm grateful to be sealed to such a wonderful guy!

7 favorite foods.

1. Spaghetti. Angel hair pasta with meat sauce. I like some restaurants' but I prefer my own.

2. Steak. Usually the most expensive one on the menu. It's really good. I love Saltgrass.

3. Chocolate Chip cookies. mmm mmm

4. Chocolate Chip cookie dough! mmm mmm mmm

5. Matt's tacos or quesadillas. They're both really good!

6. Cheeseburgers. I try to not like them, but I can't.

7. BBB. Brownie Batter Blizzard. Well, now it's Chocolate extreme blizzard, but I get the extra brownie pieces. Mm DQ

7 people I tag

1. Matt... although that might get old as a post

2. Sis Brown

3. Lindsey Taylor

4. Jenny!

5. Cheryl (who should make a blog)

6. Evelyn

7. Anyone else who'd like to... since I can't remember everyone who follows our blog. :) 

Belated Valentine's!

Well, I know I'm a bit late, but in honor of my sweet Valentine I'm going to make a list of 14 memories that Matt and I shared.

1. I met Matt when I was 13 at a stake youth standards night through a mutual friend. I then proceeded to talk to him on AIM using pink and purple colors and Curlz font. not annoying at all!

2. When I was 13, he offered to fix my "stereo" (boombox, heh). It didn't work, but I appreciated the effort!

3. When I was 15 and my boyfriend at the time broke up with me, He and Claudia came and brought me a root beer float.

4. When I was 15, he invited me to help him with his ward variety show. This was the first time he ever walked me to my door. He also told me later on that this was the time he looked at me and thought "wow, she's beautiful!"

5. Matt and I went on a "date" ( I may have been 16) and went to see a movie at Movie Tavern. Leighann and Katie B. were at his house and wanted him to come home and hang out. He told them that he'd already had plans with me so they were outta luck. He told me he'd do the same for me.

6. At a later date, Matt did have plans with Katie B. but decided he'd rather hang out with me. (yeah, he didn't do the same for her, but I was okay with that)

7. I went to Matt's house the night I knew Claudia was breaking up with him. He wanted me to stay and hang out so he wasn't alone.

8. When I had just turned 16, I asked a guy on what would be my first date. He was unable to go so I was obviously devastated. Matt called and asked if he could take me out on a date. He was my first date and he even brought me flowers!

9. When I turned 17, my boyfriend at the time wouldn't come see me on my birthday. Matt came by and took me out to 4 star.

10. We tried to date once. We went to Denny's (a good place to sit and eat) and afterwards, we had decided it was just weird.

11. From our first REAL date, we knew we were going to marry eachother.

12. After almost every stake conference I would go to Matt's house for the rest of the day. It was tradition!

13. When Matt and I were dating we went to a Tim McGraw concert. His car got lost amongst the pick-ups. I was really frustrated, but looking back, I can see how he thought it was funny.

14. And my all time favorite memory of Matt was the day that we were sealed together for time and ALL eternity on June 24, 2005. I will never forget how happy we both were looking into eachother's eyes with pure joy!

There have obviously been a great deal of memories since we've been married. I just thought I'd pull some outta way back when! Happy belated Valentine's!!

Head above water

I'm going to try something different today. Normally I will write my blogs while listening to music, but I think it influences them more than I realize. Sometimes what starts out on a positive note will end up being kind of depressing, or vice versa. So today I'm writing while wearing noise canceling headphones (that aren't playing any music). In fact I can't even hear my fingers hitting the keyboard, so it's already a little interesting. I guess we'll see if it affects my writing style at all....


The Blessings-

Our house is so wonderful. How could I ever complain about such a huge blessing? In decades, housing prices and interest rates have never been so low. Lindsey and I both happen to be making more money than we ever have before, and the potential for career growth is still there despite our struggling economy. And yet I still find myself in such a funk about the whole situation. Maybe it's the stark realization that I have big boy financial commitments now. Or that every time someone at work critiques my performance, I have a little panic attack because I know I desperately NEED this job (that I would leave immediately if I could). But nonetheless I still appreciate having my own space and all of the wonderful things that made it possible.


The Struggles-
There's no good way to say this, but it's something I need to get off my chest...

I sometimes feel like a fraud. Especially in matters of spirituality. Sure I make it to Church most Sundays, and I'll teach my lesson and make comments in class. But here I am, receiving SO MANY BLESSINGS, and I can't even tell you the last time I read my scriptures for 5 days in a row. Or even 3. I constantly re-commit myself to living a life closer to the savior and I constantly fall short of that commitment. (Which makes me feel like I never really committed at all) The part that really bothers me, is that I feel in my heart that I am a good member of the church, and that I have a strong testimony, but when I examine my actions, they very rarely reflect that feeling.

I don't want to give the impression that I am some evil worldly hooligan outside of church, but as a lifetime member, struggling with doing the basics, just doesn't seem normal to me. When I leave Church every week, I remember the joys of the spirit and the wonderful peace that accompanies it, and on Monday morning, I say "well I'm pretty tired, I'll just read my scriptures tonight" which of course I almost never do. I even find myself resenting Lindsey when she reminds me which is completely and totally unfair to her. When I have the spirit with me, I never want it to leave, but when it's gone I lose all my motivation to get it back, and that is a crapy cycle to get stuck in.

I don't really know why it is that I felt I should write about this struggle I have, but maybe putting it all down will help me in getting past it. I hope that it does and that I look back at this post in 6 months or a year and laugh at how silly I sounds. However at the same time I have a deep fear that I will look back and still relate to these same subjects.

Who knows, maybe this post wasn't for me at all. Maybe it's for someone else who shares in my trails and they need to know that they are not alone. I hope this didn't bring anyone down, because writing it has actually made me feel a little bit better. I hope everyone has a great day. Thanks for letting me vent.

name them one by one

Well I have a lot to be grateful for. Besides my awesome husband, Matt and my adorable Millie bear!

Recently at work we had a few layoffs. I guess they tried to stick it out as long as possible, but along with everyone else, ... the economy.

It put things in a bit of perspective for me. For quite some time I'd been frustrated w/ my 40 minute drive. I liked my job okay, it was really the bit of exhaustion that "commute" brought on. Yes, I'm aware that many of you may travel just as much if not longer to your job and don't consider it a career, but I'm used to going home for lunch. I usually work that close to home. So this is a bit of a readjustment. I took this position to further my career and it was a promotion.

Anyway- My mentor and dear friend who has been more help than she'll know, got let go the other day. Also, another teller at her branch was laid off. What if I were still there? hrm.

Matt's doing well at his job. He's traveling now, which is kinda a bummer on my part, but at least he's got a job.

I'm grateful for our new house. I'm grateful for the means (Mom) to decorate it into a home.

I'm grateful for my ancient car that safely gets me to and from work (for now) even after all it's been through in it's 240,000 miles.

I'm also really grateful for my calling the Stake YW Presidency. It has been really neat. I love working with these Young Women (Ann, Jenny, & Linda) as well as the girls and leaders throughout the wards. Camp is quickly approaching so I'm SUPER STOKED about that as well.

Things are going really well for us, inspite of daily wordly troubles. I know that my Heavenly Father loves me and watches out for me. It's interesting to look back and see the Lord's hand in my life. It strengthens me in my times of trouble to know that there is a reason that I'm dealing with what's going on. I love him. He's pretty cool to do that for me!

So, my challenge to you is to look back throughout the past few months or years and think of some of the things that were really trying at the time, and to ponder on how Heavenly Father was actually helping. It's probably personal, but you can post if you want. :)

Wow...

Well, I guess Matt doesn't intend on ever writing here.... I suppose he's too busy watching hulu.com to do anything else. I'm sure it doesn't help that we don't currently have internet at home, so his only opportunities (like mine) are at work. However, this is pretty much the only thing that's not blocked (yet *crosses fingers*) so.... during times where we're slow I like to blog hop. And i noticed it's been a while since my last post.

Some updates.... Sean's at the MTC. Matt and I didn't go, but supposedly nobody cried. Bonus points for Cheryl :)

I had a birthday, shout hooray! I'm 22 now... which for some reason sounds ridiculously older than 21... so that's kinda weird.

Speaking of 21... Matt was 21 when we got married. We were SO young!!! I can't believe how quickly time has passed. My goodness.

Other than that, we're staying busy at work. I fortunately did not get laid off (some 50 people in our district did) so yay for jobs. Matt's working harder than ever. Hopefully it will pay off soon!

Matt and I are just really blessed right now to have so much support of friends and family that live so close. We're really enjoying life. And hopefully I'll get a new car before summer. So if you know anyone who needs a car for their teen mine's kinda for sale.

Well thanks to all for reading. Sorry not a whole lot is going on.

Maybe Matt will soon surprise us with a post? Maybe?

hrm...

well, I haven't posted because Matt was adoment about making this next post his... well he took too long, don'tcha think?

Well we've been REALLY busy, I guess you could say. We moved into our house this last week! Yeah, it's great. We had some bumps along the way, though (our fridge fiasco).

I'm working dilligently to get everything unpacked and organized so that we can get some pics up here! Meanwhile, Matt's out of town in Denver for work. Yeah.... this WHOLE week.... hrm..

Things have been going great. Sean leaves this weekend for his mission! Can you believe it, he's so BIG! We had his farewell party a few weeks back so that his college friends in town for the holidays could join in the fun of his Spiderman bouncehouse. I know you expected nothing less of Sean. It'll be really weird when he's gone though, I'll admit.

Millie's doing well. I haven't noticed any more of her UTI symptoms. She also really likes her own backyard but still enjoys GrammaGrampa's (Matt's parents). I will say she is quite the protector. I took a few days off at the end of last week to get things situated, start unpacking, make utility phonecalls, etc., and when any sort of service guy or anything came over (since it was just us girls) she went nutzo. I've never her seen or heard her bark so scary. The hair on her back would stand straight up (which i thought was only a feline trait) and she was on the look out. I'll admit it was kinda comforting, especially since these guys coming by could obviously see I was home alone. I think it's kinda sweet.

And... let's see what else, well, Matt's car is finally in the shop. It hasn't been inspected since December '06, on account that the check engine light won't let it pass. So, after we paid a lump sum in ticket fines for it, we figure it might as well get fixed..... so we can pay double for it to pass. yeah.... being a grown up with responsibility is not as cool as I used to think.

That's about it for now, we still don't have the internet at home, it may be a few weeks, we have to upgrade something about our Mac for it to run WiFi, which is a lil bit frustrating, but ah well. At least Matt hooked up my TV and my kitchen radio before he left.


Well that's about it for us! :)